BooHooHooHooo! *wailing and gnashing teeth* Where have I gone wrong as a mother? Why? Why? Whyyyyy? My son got a tattoo! I think I'll pause now and have a nervous breakdown. *tears streaming down face* I'm crawling in bed and going to stay there in a fetal position for weeks and possibly months. Son, after all I've taught you and all the threats that I've made. Still you do this! My heart is cracking in two. *Snubbing and slinging snot* Pray, saints!
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